"Luce" Fired and Replaced With New Synodality Mascot, "Melty the Icecap"
Melty Is an H1B Hire Willing to Work for Less
All credit to for the inspiration for this one
Luce had a strong run as the Vatican Synod on Synodality mascot:
But then she started hanging out too much with the trads. Also, she was demanding a pay raise.
Obviously, Luce is now too traditional and too expensive to be the frontline mascot for synodality.
So what is synodality to do?
Obviously, it’s to replace Luce with an H1B visa hire. “How about Vanilla Gorilla the Happy Hippy Yeti?” suggested the new polarity manager for the Synod on Synodality, Fr. Martin James.
“No, that would be cultural appropriation and sounds a little too racist,” responded Cardinal Schuster of Dusseldorf, Germany.
“How about we instead hire a personified ice cube because we’re all into blessing ice cubes now?” another synodality regional manager suggested
And so, after Luce was forced to train her replacement, that was how Melty the Icecap, the new mascot for the 2025 Synod on Synodality, was born.
Let’s all go pray the environmental mysteries of the rosary with Melty before she (or he?) melts.
Oh no, they took poor Melty away from the North Pole and south to warm Italy, and she melted.
Poor Melty.
Here are some people’s thoughts about “Melty the Icecap”:
I had a very stressful couple days leading up to a job interview today. Your satire was the perfect way to come back down to earth again! 😂
I did read something the other day about a Fourth Century Bishop of Milan who refused to allow Arians to use churches in his diocese. He was quite rightly upbraided by the Imperial authorities for his deficient ecumenical approach, and lack of inclusiveness. I think he even refused to let them use the churches for gladiatorial displays, as a way of engaging the youth. I think he was called Ambrose or something, but thank goodness his promotion was held up, and we've heard little of him since! Not the kind of approach we want nowadays, for sure.